Building Unity Through Sharing the Eight-Point Program

Deepa and Vasanth are two young adults living in Chennai, India. They started a regular satsang for young adults. Recently, they were also asked to run an introductory course in passage meditation for a local center offering support and courses to underprivileged young people.

This is the Chennai YA satsang, with Deepa pictured in the front-middle.
The papers these YA’s are holding up are handouts with mantrams and passages.

Deepa

I first got a glimpse into Sri Easwaran's teachings when I picked up his beautiful book Meditation from a friend's bedside table. In an instant, I knew it was what I had been looking for all my life. After years of reading spiritual literature, self-help books, and books on the law of attraction and the subconscious mind, with Meditation, I realized I had finally come home! And life has never been the same. I cannot count the number of ways in which Sri Easwaran's teachings have impacted and helped me. I have also, ever since always felt a guiding hand with me. Someone I can communicate with through troubled times, someone I can look up to for support at all times.

How I wish I had found Easwaran earlier in my life! How much easier and more beautiful everything would have been. And so when it was suggested we help young adults in India through Sri Easwaran's teachings, I jumped at the idea. It's been 6 months since we started our young adult programme in Chennai, India. India is a country that is already burdened with religion and ritual. People are raised with strong beliefs. It's sometimes a challenge to make people step outside it all and look at life just as it is…to bring in the idea that just living a kind, disciplined life is enough. Sri Easwaran teaches the recipe for a perfect, peaceful, happy life, right in the midst of our circumstances. He teaches us how to be happy and have good relationships. We strongly believe that it's the need of the hour for young adults and we are really happy to be helping with this. We thank everyone at the Blue Mountain Center for keeping Sri Easwaran's teachings alive.

Vasanth

We jumped at the idea when the idea of a young adult satsang was proposed. The thought that we were going to spread Sri Easwaran's highly effective and practical 8-point program excited us. There was an element of anxiety as well, as were unsure if our approach would work.

Nevertheless we started in right earnest. We came up with a format for the sessions. We spread the word to colleges and through our senior satsang group. We put together handouts consisting of passages and mantrams for young adults.

We were overwhelmed by the initial response. Close to 30 young adults attended the first session. It was a joy to teach passage meditation and meditate together.

There have been close to half a dozen sessions. We believe we coordinate the sessions for our own healing. It has helped us to deepen our practice as well. As Sri Krishna tells Arjuna in the Gita, we see ourselves in other young adults and other young adults in us. The unity is undeniable.

Here are two photos from an event with a group of 55, who gathered together for the one-time introductory course to passage meditation as part of their educational training.

Here are just two comments from the group about their experience in the introduction to passage meditation and the 8 points.

“I pledge I will meditate every day, control my stress and emotions. I will thereby develop my self-confidence.” – Keerthika

“My immediate goal is to start meditation on a regular basis. I will definitely apply what I have learnt.”  – Gladiya

Eknath Easwaran: Finding Unity in Conflict

This week we bring you two excerpts from the book Patience by Eknath Easwaran, highlighting how we can find harmony and strengthen personal relationships even in the midst of conflict.

Unite Against the Problem

Years ago, I watched the Brazilian athlete Pelé play his last game of soccer. He was retiring at the peak of his career, one of the best soccer players the world has seen, and in this last game he was playing with the New York Cosmos against a team for which he had scored his most memorable goals: Santos of Brazil. For the first half of the game, Pelé played his best for the Cosmos. But the second half had a brilliant touch: he joined his opponents and played his best for them. This is what we should do in a disagreement: play half the time for the other side, half the time for our own. It is not a question of sacrificing principles; this is the only way to see the whole.

If we could see the game more clearly – and the results were not so tragic – the spectacle of a quarrel would make us laugh. When we played soccer in my village, one of my cousins used to get so excited that he would shoot the ball into his own goal. We used to say, “Never mind the other side; watch out for Mandan.” When two people quarrel, that’s just what they are doing – scoring against their own side. Whatever the disagreement, we are the home team, the Cosmos – all of us. Our problems, whether personal, national, or environmental, are the visitors. And the mystics say simply, “Support your team. There is the opponent, down at the other end of the field. Unite against the problem; don’t go scrapping among yourselves.”

Otherwise, there are no winners in this game. Once we divide against ourselves, whether at home or between races or nations, there can only be losers. On the other hand, there is no disagreement so serious that it cannot be set right if both sides can join hands and work hard for a common solution. It is not at all easy, and the results will not be immediate. But wherever there is hatred, complete love can be established; wherever there is conflict, complete unity can be established. The choice is up to us. 

Finding the Common Ground

For Gandhi, love and selfless action were one. "I don't want to be at home only with my friends," he said, "I want to be at home with my enemies too." It wasn't a matter of speaking; he lived it out through forty years of solid opposition.

The other day I saw some documentary footage of Gandhi with a prominent political figure who opposed him so relentlessly that people said he had a problem for every solution Gandhi offered. These scenes were shot in 1944, when the two leaders met for a series of talks in which literally millions of lives were hanging in the balance. It took my breath away to see Gandhi treating his opponent with the affection one shows an intimate friend. At the beginning of each day's discussions, the man's face would be a mask of hostility; at the end of the day, both men would come out smiling and joking. Then, by the next morning, the man would have frozen over again, and Gandhi would start all over with the same cheerful patience, trying to find some common ground.

That is how the mystic approaches conflict, and it pulls the rug out from under all the traditional theories. There is a lot being written these days about conflict resolution, which I am glad to see. But no matter what you read, they will always say in effect, "This is how you deal with your opponent." Gandhi, Saint Francis, Saint Teresa would all say, "No. The moment you start thinking about the other person as an opponent, you make it impossible to find a solution." There are no opponents in a disagreement; there are simply two people facing a common problem. In other words, they are not in opposite camps. They are in the same camp: the real opponent is the problem.

To apply this, you have to set aside the question of who is to blame. We have a saying in my mother tongue: "It takes two to get married and two to quarrel." No matter what the circumstances, neither person bears sole responsibility for a quarrel. It is an encouraging outlook, because if both are responsible, both together can find a solution – not merely a compromise, but a way to resolve the quarrel peacefully.

To do this, it is necessary to listen – and listen with respect. For how can you end a quarrel if you do not even hear what the quarrel is about? How can you solve a problem with two sides if you never hear what the other side is? More than that, if you can't listen to the other person with detachment, you will not have the detachment to understand your own position objectively, either. It's not just one side of the problem you can't see; it's both. So listen with respect: it may hurt you, it may irritate you, but it is a healing process.

Gradually, if you can bear with this, you will find that you are no longer thinking about "my point of view" and "your point of view." Instead you say, "There is a point of view that is common to you and me, which we can discover together." Once you can do this, the quarrel is over. You may not have reached a solution – usually, in fact, there is a lot of hard work left to do. But the quarrel itself is over, because now you know that there are two of you playing on the same side against the problem.

The Path to Detachment

This week’s post is from Sheryl in Davis, California, who describes her ability to overcome a "family samskara” (an ingrained habit or tendency) using her practice of the eight points.

The 8PP (eight-point program) has changed my life. I have spent a lot of years working on what I now call a “family samskara”, and this path has opened up the most positive and transformative way to do so.

At a very early age, I was drawn to a relationship with the Lord of Love, although it was a confused relationship in that I thought I could direct the Lord to do what I thought would be best for myself and those around me. Through many difficult situations and the loss of the family through the diseases of alcoholism and mental illness, I’ve been on a very long quest for a positive path that would heal grief and the past. I've also yearned for a deep connection with the Lord of Love, finally realizing that I would need to surrender to life as it happens. 

In June, 2011, the 8PP came into my life. There were difficult challenges surrounding me, and the 8PP appeared at a time when I was desperate to find “something else” to help with the fear, confusion, anger, attachment, and grief that was happening around me and in my mind. I had spent years in 12-step programs where I heard a lot about detachment…from others, from the things they did, the way the lived, what they said and thought. I soon began to understand that Sri Easwaran had a very different slant on detachment, and that he was talking about detachment from my own stuff, the opinions, likes, dislikes, and judgments going on in my mind. This was revolutionary thinking coming from where I’d been!! 

The more I read, meditated, studied and listened, the more I began to get small glimpses of the freedom found from this level and understanding of detachment from those I love, from anyone around me. I’d grown up thinking it was my responsibility to “save others” and the only way to do that was to know all I could about their situation and “help” them with it. This did not work all those years ago, but it was the only thing I knew. Until…the 8PP!!

Sheryl on at Dillon Beach during a mantram walk at a weekend retreat.

The family samskara I’ve identified has certainly been an on-going challenge throughout my life. It has manifested with the mind putting attention on the likes and dislikes around relationships, to focus on the ‘right’ way things ’should’ be. With the help of passages such as “Give Up Anger” from the Dhammapada, I’ve learned that “no sorrow will ever befall those who never try to possess people and things as their own.” From the Sutta Nipata, “Discourse on Good Will’ I’ve learned to pray that “all creatures may be filled with joy and peace,” and to allow my love to grow boundlessly for all others, all creatures. In Lao Tzu’s passage, “The Best” I’ve learned that I want to be like water, benefiting all and not competing with anyone or anything. I’ve used the “Recommended Passages for Specific Uses” in the back of God Makes the Rivers to Flow to choose passages that are transforming old ideas from the mind into the person I want to become. That person is the most loving, healthily detached, giving, grateful wife, mother, grandmother, friend, satsang, community and world member I can be. 

St. Francis among the lilies in Sheryl’s backyard.

Now I have the resources I need to continue to grow in this manner. In The Constant Companion, I love the description of detachment found on page 241, “Virata, Free From Craving”, and a quote from Epictetus: “…to behave in life as you would behave at a banquet. When something is being passed around, as it comes to you, stretch out your hand and take a portion of it gently. When it passes on, do not try to hold on to it; when it has not yet come to you, do not reach out for it with your desire, but wait until it presents itself. So act toward children, toward spouse, toward office, toward wealth." I have added “toward grandchildren” to this list!! 

Sheryl and her husband Bob in West Seattle. 

The 8PP continues to open my eyes and change the thoughts in the mind about life, love and others! I believe I’m able to see and be so grateful for the gifts around me because of a more solid, loving and detached manner of “knowing”. My husband, Bob, and I attended his first Introductory Weekend Retreat this year because he wanted to learn more about passage meditation; what a gift! We have many opportunities to give and grow in the two communities in which we live. I know that the “family samskara” is still lurking around, and that the mind is still “upsettable”. I also know more about, believe in and live the 8 point program each day to the best of my ability, and with the mantram, meditation, slowing down with one-pointed attention, constantly training the senses, putting others first in a healthy, detached manner, continual reading of spiritual materials, and engaging in incredible opportunities for satsang, this samskara is beginning to pack its bags!! 

Sheryl and Bob after Bob's first mantram walk at Dillon Beach in February 2016.